“The Lord is close to the broken-hearted and saves those who are crushed in spirit” (Psalm 34:18)
Fast forward a week or so and I am sitting with a group of ladies and one of them is expressing her concerns over an acquaintance and how she tends to override situations when another spoke up and said you must set boundaries immediately. There was that word again, "sigh". I knew I needed to listen up and take notes. God was helping me learn and understand the need for boundaries. Fast forward a few more weeks and I am sitting on a plane talking about life and the word boundaries pop into the conversation. I listened intently at the advice because I knew God was using yet another person to teach me what He so badly wanted me to learn.
My takeaways (as I still learn) are: boundaries are created to keep us safe. When toddlers began to move a parent creates boundaries to protect them. Most of the time they do not like the boundary. They want to bust through it. They don't see the dangers of breaking the boundary, but once the boundary has been compromised dangers are being invited in. This happens to us as adults also. We don't see the dangers of compromising just one tiny boundary. What could it hurt right? Then the gate has been opened and before we realize it our life is not our own anymore. We don't even know what our boundaries originally were or how to get them back.
Boundaries are God's way of protecting how He made us unique and different. Our ways don't need to mimic someone else's ways. No matter whether it's in the professional realm of life or personal we have different views and we should never be made to feel our views or thoughts are not valid. The moment we allow our boundaries to be compromised we are saying my thoughts aren't important. Don't confuse being difficult and not working well with others to be the same as setting up boundaries. I am not implying that concept at all.
My last takeaway is this: if you feel you can't be yourself in the situation you are in then you probably compromised your boundaries. I have found setting boundaries may not always be easy and implementing them is sometimes even more difficult (I have found some people don't like it when you tell them your expectations i.e. your boundaries, especially if they are the type to think boundaries don't apply to them). It is ok if they remove themselves from your life or you remove them from your life. It does not mean you can't speak or be kind, it means you value your worth and know you are fearfully and wonderfully made!
God wants to put the pieces of your brokenness back together again. Are you willing to implement those boundaries and take a chance on God? Because we know He will never leave us or take us down a path to hurt us. He wants to save our crushed-spirits! I invite you to take a look at where you are right now. Are you allowing others to break through your boundaries or are you the one breaking through someone else's boundaries? I am praying God helps us live our best lives with our boundaries intact.