Sunday, April 14, 2019

Let Go and Let God!

*Not the post I intended to write today, but it's what God placed on my heart:) Praying if you are doubting or hurting today you will turn to God's word and trust Him! Let Go and Let God!

My Facebook post was only the beginning:)
Sitting here this morning soaking up God’s word and in awe of His love for me! So often I jump ahead of Him, take charge, try to reason or control my circumstances. Anyone who knows me is not surprised by that piece of information😜. But today I’m reminded again of letting go and letting God be in charge. Trust, a difficult action for me! 
If you are struggling with trust like me, just know God loves us more than we can imagine. It’s hard to trust because most of the time when we are trusting Him humans are involved in the mix. It’s hard to find the balance, but there’s something to Be still and know I’m God. I’m not always embracing my dust but I’m working on trusting Him to make it beautiful! I know His will for me is so much more beautiful than anything I could will for me. Today I’ll regroup and Let Go and Let God:))

Are you like me and often question God? I am the expert of this and not proud of it! Why do I doubt? Why do I often question His will and if it's the best for me? Why do I step in and try to take control? Because I AM HUMAN!! Those imperfections I talked about day one, they exist in ALL of us. Trouble is many of us don't take the time to self reflect and listen to God. Or in my case, I take the time and listen, but still question or take control. We don't trust Him completely and the enemy LOVES when he can find an open window to crawl through.

I have always been a take charge kind of girl. I was told if you want something done do it yourself. I'm not one to sit around and wait on others to do it for me. That can be a positive trait, but a taxing trait. Sometimes it is good to delegate or depend on others, but through life circumstances I allowed my mindset to be altered. I went from doing to surviving. Honestly, neither of these are good alone. We need balance. With maturity in our faith comes the balance. We should be able to rely on others, but we should never rely so much upon others that we feel so defeated our only purpose is to survive. We MUST trust God, but be able to trust ourselves and others too. When humans break our trust or we fail we find ourselves not trusting, sometimes we don't even trust God. We must remember God can ALWAYS be trusted, but we have to get out of the way to allow the trust to take place (speaking directly to myself right here:)).  Proverbs 3:5 says, "Trust in the Lord with all your heart, and do not lean on your own understanding." We don't have to understand we just have to trust. Boy, that is harder than it sounds!!

God can use our life experiences to guide us and help us grow, but we have to be alert and willing learners. (One I tend to trip on too often.) I get scared and stop trusting. I ask questions, lose focus. Each time I think I am standing on solid ground some slip up reminds me my foundation isn't as solid as it needs be. This is when we must re-evaluate and dig deeper into God's word and trust Him to guide us.

Since I have been prompted to begin this blog God has placed people in my life that have shared their personal journeys with me. If you think your struggles are like no one else's let me remind you that is NOT the case. The enemy wants you to think your failure, your defeat, your secret is like no one else's. He wants you to believe you are alone and cannot trust anymore.  IT"S A LIE!!!! I have a tribe of Godly people I know I can count on to pray for me and not be so quick to advise me. My advice is to get a Godly tribe, but don't make your tribe too large because truth gets confused with chaos (BTW social media is NOT the tribe I am talking about) Share your fears and burdens and ask for prayer! Don't be afraid to ask for prayer! Be specific and more than anything pray for God's will not your own!

In my time with God this morning I read something Beth More said in her study "Breaking Free" that resonated with me: "Like Peter on the mount of transfiguration, we're so caught up in the tabernacles we want to build that we sometimes miss a fresh revelation of God's glory right before our eyes." She went on to talk about sin leading to death or obedience leading to righteousness. I had to ask myself, "Am I concentrating so much on building something beautiful that I am missing the beauty found right in front of me?" "Am I sinning or being obedient?" Trust God and know that no matter your past or current circumstances He loves you and wants to guide you EVERY STEP of the way!

Comment below that you trusting God in your life or share a story or ask for prayer. We are one family in Christ!

Monday, April 1, 2019

Financial Fiasco Part 2

I had every intention of posting yesterday, but the enemy had other plans and I gave into the insecurities and self-doubt planted in my head. I allowed it. I even nurtured it and babied it! When you are getting closer to God the enemy presses in harder. He will try to take any happiness you have just to tear you down. Last night and this morning I prayed even harder, pressed in closer to Him, spent time this morning listening to an amazing sermon from Rick Warren from his Unshakable series, and listened to a very important person in my life. Thank the Lord the enemy is defeated once more:) The devil may try to get me down, but he will NEVER win!!

It is humbling how God places people in your life at exact moments for His purpose. This morning I learned of a precious person feeling completely defeated because of financial fiascos. This person is much older than me. Financial Fiascos do not target specific ages! I have never had more clarity in the purpose of these posts than today. (The enemy may have tried to stop me yesterday, but God had a purpose for today.)

You see financial fiascos are temporary. They don't define me or you. Oh they will try and I have fallen into the trap of thinking there is no way out, but I know with God all things are possible! 

I sit here in the sun by the pool at the beach house we rent each year writing this. (I am sure many will think, aren't you in debt? How are you paying for a beach vacation? Shouldn't you be using that money to pay down your debt?) Well yes, I am in debt, I paid cash (from my tax return) for the house, and I could pay down my debt with the money, but I have a VERY different outlook on debt and getting out of debt than most. AND I won't apologize for it either!

You see my dad worked 6 days a week for more than 35 years to make our dreams come true. My mom always wanted a beach house. They were one step away from acquiring that dream and she was diagnosed with cancer again and lived 3 weeks. I learned at that very moment you are not promised tomorrow. The very weekend she passed we were supposed to be heading to the beach to see this house she wanted. My Jackson was 4 weeks old. She had bought him his first beach trip book from Pottery Barn for us to record his trip. That trip never happened. 

Fast forward one year and dad was diagnosed with cancer. His surgery was successful and his chemo cured him. Then 2010 comes around and I was diagnosed with cancer. My babies were in Kindergarten and 4th grade. I KNOW what living each day to the fullest is ALL about!! Yes I want out of debt and I have goals, but I also want memories. If I die today, my debt is paid off immediately with life insurance, but guess what if I live every second of everyday stressing over my debt, not living, but only working to eliminate it, what have I gained? No debt, miserable life, and NO memories! My family memories are what gets me through days I miss my mom so bad I can't breathe. Memories I have made with my kids reassure me I am ok and living. 

No matter what, if it's God's will and I am a good steward of His gifts He will help me accomplish my goals. I explained to a co-worker last week my thoughts. If I work 6 plus days a week and go or do nothing extra I will be debt free sooner, but at whose expense. My kids didn't sign up for our situation and I will not take away our memories because I didn't live the way I should have the past 4 years. I am a very frugal person by nature now. I have been for many years. I fell off that wagon, but I know how to get back up and try to fix it. Will it be easy? NO! Will there be days when I think I am going to drown? YES! But With God ALL Things ARE Possible! I will hold onto that truth and live my life to the fullest, making beautiful memories EVERY step of the way. 

My McCall will be graduating this year. This season of our life is near completion and a new season is beginning. I won't have this week with her again for a VERY long time, if ever. I will cherish every memory. Praying time slows down just for a week:) 

I am NOT saying or promoting to live like crazy, spend freely, and worry about the consequences later!! Live frugal, know when a memory is more important than a debt, and pay cash!